GAME PLAYER
Computer games teach me things about myself. I play many varieties of the less complicated games. I see myself getting stressed on the more challenging levels, so I just quit. Even a time out or stop to get a cup of tea puts me in a different breathing space. I can feel my body relax and tension flow out of me.

I find myself angling my torso to direct a shot or tensing when the timer is about to run out. Then I remember. It’s only a game.

Just like life.

Then I realize how silly we are to give so much tension to the game of life. I get so frustrated at some of the more difficult game levels. I think why can’t they make this achievable? Why is this so bloody hard? And then I remember. It’s only a game. I can stop any time I want.

It used to be that I’d admonish myself as being a quitter, not stepping up to the challenge. What useless, self worth rot! It’s only a game for god’s sake!

So now I play a whole game and get to the really difficult level, the last level and I become “She Who Starts Over”. I am no longer a quitter. I have stepped up to the challenge of allowing an easy life. It feels so much better.

I have been there, done that, got the t-shirt and had it repossessed too! I don’t need to prove myself anymore. I know I can face and overcome tall buildings and bankers. I can start over. God, what a relief!